And the chances that the character will be a woman of color? Forget about it. Thankfully, streaming platforms make it easier than ever to seek out the many filmmakers who do create stories about queer women of color—because yes, those filmmakers exist. We even have our own streaming platform now! Visit her website, kimwongshing. Directed by Eric Daniel Peddle, the documentary was filmed over the course of five years. Available to stream on Amazon Prime Video. Available to stream on Hulu.

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Mostly, my dapperqueer identity means that I spent my formative years drawing from an aesthetic with very few examples and resources. Like other Black women, I cheered for characters that began to show us as powerful, intelligent, and yes, sexy without regard to European standards of beauty. And yet, Black intentionally masculine of center women remained in the background, if we were present at all. So like many Black queer women, I turned to the Internet and devoured content from amateur and indie producers. I even became one myself, writing and producing a web series Quare Life about a dapperqueer Black woman and her queer friends navigating relationships and life on the south side of Chicago. Eventually my research and writing took me to Lena Waithe.
Unless you have some super amazing other dating prospect there isn't a huge reason to cut this relationship off now. I think patience and understanding is also important. I'm pretty disturbed by the level of dismissiveness seen in many of the comments here. I'm in the exact same pulling-out-my-hair situation that you are. Anyway, I am not sure what the future holds for us, but it was nice to find your blog and see other couples dealing with the same challenges. Your comment is SO spot on in my experience. My boyfriend is just going into his third year of med school. How would that motivate you to work out every day to get a girl.